I’ve always been the smart girl in the group. Everyone knows that in most groups of people you will have different types that fall into a category or two and end up being defined by that. You may have the artsy one, the cute one, the tall one, the fat one, or like me the smart one. I have taken pride in my intelligence and I even proudly own the term bookworm. However, my paradigm is shifting as I fight my bad habits of soothing my emotions by eating and realize how much I have had to push to achieve my now 60 pound weight loss.
I used to believe that people who were in shape or healthy or athletic were somehow shallow and self absorbed. I used to attribute their beautiful, healthy bodies to good genes or enough money to workout all day and therefore belonged to group that would never include me. I used to believe that some people were just meant to be fat or big boned or plump. The longer that I look at my changing body and look toward my goal of losing another 40-50 pounds (maybe more) I realize that not only will I belong to that group of people, it forces me to come to terms with my own devastatingly flawed thinking.
I must now admit that the people who I looked at with awe because of their flawless looking figures are usually VERY hard working, intelligent people. They usually understand sacrifice and selflessness more than most people who spend their days eating doughnuts and drinking sodas. While there are shallow people in every demographic that can possibly be defined, people who spend time pre-preparing healthy, clean meals and pushing their bodies past the limit to strengthen it should not be thrown into that category willy-nilly. I have had to admit that my thought process was in fact prejudiced, ignorant and frankly, based on jealousy. Getting in shape requires something that most Americans do not understand, sacrifice. Staying in shape requires something that even fewer people execute on, that thing called follow through or consistency. Feeding your body properly, bringing your temptations under control and challenging your own limitations in order to reach a goal is how you build character. Anyone can simply eat whatever is convenient or what is put in front of you, it requires effort to make sure that what you are consuming is beneficial and lines up with your personal objectives.
This post may not be as sexy as the previous, but I had to write it because it speaks to me. So, I will continue waking up at 5:45am to do a workout in my living room before my four children wake up. I will continue to avoid making excuses when I don’t feel up to it or realize that I may be taking on feats beyond what I can handle because I am a single mother. I will continue to consistently push toward my goal by prepping my meals ahead of time and even when the scale doesn’t move or goes up a couple of pounds I will be relentless in my pursuit knowing that at the end of the day, hard work always pays off. I will do this because I want to teach my children to believe in themselves but more than that, I want me to believe in me.