Dating “outside of your race”: a paradigm shift—or is it?

I just watched a funny and insightful YouTube episode of The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl and I must admit I almost feel forced to react to it.  I’m not sure who I should credit with the humor and truthful observations but I will credit those who are attempting to shed some light on the seriously outdated and ignorant stereotypes, typically held by blacks, that where highlighted in this clip.

We can start with how annoyingly wrong the ditsy, misinformed friend of the main character was as she is certain that she knows “what white guys want” and influences her friend to be casual when it is inappropriate.  The cute (white) guy, Jay, who is attempting to impress the awkward black girl (ABG) and makes bad assumptions about her preferences rather than just being himself evokes the right amount of pity as he sits through some uncomfortable, nearly emasculating moments.  And the main character is heart-warming as she finds a way to loosen up and just be herself while standing up for what is right.  Now that we’ve visited the positives, let’s look at those awful characters who were supposed to be caricatures of actual people, but quite unfortunately they describe, almost to a tee, some very real people and their reactions to chocolate and vanilla people enjoying each other’s company…potentially sexually 😉 .

There were the men who showed obvious resentment for ABG being out on a date with a cute white man and black women who rolled their eyes.  There was the ex-boyfriend who thought he’d driven her to do something strange.  There was the disgusting woman at the spoken word event who continually made references to her dislike of pastel, pink, or light colored penises (to which I could only think, what does penis color matter, and what has a “big, black dick” done for you than another one can’t…get you knocked up and left alone with too many kids to raise?)…perhaps you can tell I took particular issue with that one, eh?

Despite all of those people, I was the most disappointed with ABG when at the end, she failed to kiss the cute guy that she was obviously attracted to because someone she knew had a reaction to cute guy’s skin color.  I suppose it was enough to get me to want to see another episode, but left me ticked that she would succumb to pressure that is only applied when it is convenient for the other people to feel good about themselves, but where are those same people when companionship is being sought?

I decided long ago to stop limiting myself to one skin color of man and found that I could truly enjoy myself, not because my date was not black, but because I stopped reminding both of us that I was…

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